Posted on: Monday, December 10th, 2012
Posted in: Comics
Comments: 47
Angry Army’s Guide to Owning an Outdated Console Part 1
It’s that time of the year again, new games, new consoles, and new problems with obtaining said games and consoles! I mean, how many times has this happened to you at the popular game store?
Every time this happens when a new console is out, and when you realize that other more trustworthy places without shady business practice have that brand new console on the market, it’s sold out there as well! So now here’s the big problem, you’ve got at least $500 in the pocket that’s just itching to be spent on some digital entertainment, but you want that same familiar feeling that will remind you of that new console, what’s the solution?
You buy the OLDER MODEL! 
That’s right, with this guide for the next few weeks, you’ll learn how to upgrade to that wonderful obsolete hunk o’ junk! This week I’ll tell you the first thing you need, the console itself! Now, normally you’d just go back to that jackass at the counter that told you he had no new consoles in stock and buy yourself something used… but that can go upwards of $75 to $125! You gotta save cash for those games! So instead of that, stick it to him by going towards your nearest seediest Pawn Shop!
Here if you’re lucky, you can find one of the oldest outdated model console you can possibly find, sometimes they sell for $50 to $100, there’s nothing fancy about this, but every penny you pinch means more games for you! Just look at how beautiful this piece of crap is!
It has all the connections and doodads you could want with it! May want to clean out that puss first… and fix that fan. Congratulations! You now own something nobody else in their right mind would buy at this time of year unless they’re extremely desperate for something to play! This is just step one however, next week we’ll take a look at buying games and accessories with what remains in your wallet!
Want to see more art from me? Check out My Deviantart page!
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47 thoughts on “Angry Army’s Guide to Owning an Outdated Console Part 1”
“I’m old! I’m cheap! I’m obsolete!”
“And I delivered the two greatest JRPGs of the entire generation! A genre, by the way, that pretty much defined videogaming in the 90s entirely!”
Furries. Stupid, uninformed and sensationalistic.
Agreed with this I find this with all furries too.
I dunno…depends on the System. My original release PS3 actually has MORE features then the newer models do (screw you, you non-Backward compatible PoS!!!). Same applies for PSPs now that I think about it, since original ones, without Firmware updates or those newer motherboards are INFINITELY better. (It’s pretty cool being able to play Baldur’s Gate on my PSP (it’s a little clunky though, obviously), and use fan-burned classics, until PSN gets them available (which takes FOREVER)…or play Super Nintendo games and the like (can’t find a portable version with the features I like. The Supaboy is sort of nice, but has horrible battery life and sound issues, while the other one (can’t remember the name atm) is better in every way, aside from the buttons being in an odd configuration, making some games EXTREMELY difficult.
I know I am going to get flamed for this, but the grammar/spelling in this article is abhorrent. I apologize to the author, but this is 3rd grade writing. I know, I’m a teacher. Using incorrect 3rd and 2nd person tenses, spelling errors, and weird adjective use all over. I know it’s the internets and all, but you’d think someone would proofread something that is going to be seen by a lot of people. Just saying….
The guy is a furry fan. I’m sure grammar and spelling isn’t on his priorities.
Oh and I’m sure they would say that “it’s not important”, or that it is irrelevant. Probably flame me or you for it. No, they’re just dumb.
why is the show called angryjoe if his name is Phill?
Because they are different people.
Joe is our Comander Joe wile Phil is a drawer and Major General
2 different people
The only problem being that the Wii U isn’t selling anywhere near either A) close to what Nintendo is claiming or B) anywhere near the actual sales of the Wii….Stores constantly have both Wii U in stock…..And it’s probably a combination of NO Advertisements and the soccer moms and grandmas just don’t want one…When you have no ads it doesn’t help people know what the hell it is
the Wii sadly is Nintendo greatest fail whit thousands of bad games and barely any good one (Pandora’s Tower, Super Smash Bros Brawl, Mario Kart, Monster Hunter 3 and few others) so basically people is too scared to buy it and waste their money for 2 games out of thoousands.
Unless unless they release a game that is proved to be a good they wont sell anything
The Wii is the 5th best-selling video game system of all time. How can you call it Nintendo’s greatest fail? Haven’t you heard of virtual boy? If anything the Wii saved the company after the Gamecube and the N64.
And here i wasted my money on a vita…
Ok, that was a joke, love my vita
I really don’t get the marketing in this industry. I mean, the same thing happened for the Wii. It was a craze back then, everyone wanted for the holydays and they were no where to be seen. Isn’t that money lost for Nintendo? I actually wanted one since I had the gameCube, but after always comming up dry and broken hearthed from the shops, I said srew it and bought a Xbox and Nintendo never saw my money ever again.
The Wii U has no problems anywhere near the Wii….Every store constantly has them in stock…There is NO Wii U craze nobody knows it even exists to a certain extent..All the day time talk shows were pumping Wii vomit constantly and NOBODY is doing that for the Wii U….Nintendo is full of lies it’s not selling extremely well
Ya know what I find amusing about all this… People keep calling Phill, Joe…
yet i still not get why all the confution its odbious they are two different people
Fuck the Wii enough said. The Game Cube was a good console for Nintendo, but some “genius” said, “fuck that shit lets cancel that outdated piece of shit console and give gamers what they really want, shitty motion control, hardly any T or M rated games, and replace them with as many boring games as possible. Granted there were some good ones like: Mad World, the No more Hereos series, Super Smash Bros. Brawl 2, De Blob, any Mario game (half the time), and House of the Dead Overkill. But when you compare the Wii to other console games and PC/MMO games (who have a much broder selection of games) the Wii loses this fight. Hell the Wii makes a better door stop than console so when the Wii-U was announced all I was thinking is that they better step it up or I shall rain hell down upon thee! And if they get rid of motion control that’ll be a plus because we all know that it’s a stupid fucking gimmick like 3D.
3DS is amazing,and works perfectly with games. Not a gimmick at all.. Also the i own the Wii-U and it is not a gimmick at all. I played Zombie-U with the gamepad and it works perfectly, and actually makes the game a lot more scary. Like trying to mess with your backpack, and looking at your gamepad switching things around, just to look up and see a zombie right in your face. It literally has countless possibilities. Oh and you forgot the always amazing Legend of Zelda games. Skyward Sword proved that motion controls can work, and have amazing games on the. (Its the only game to do so though.) Mario galaxy is the second highest rated game this gen, but you didn’t really use motion control all that often.
*clears throat* Ahem!…. As a longtime fanboy of Nintendo ever since I was the age of four…… The Wii U is a gimmick. I’ve learned to acknowledge this by the time my Nintendo Wii gathered dust currently in the corner of my room, where it prays that by some miracle it will live to see the day I get my hands on Fatal Frame 4. If Nintendo was smart, the Wii U would idealistic to release the game for that system. The problem the Wii and Wii U are they have potential. But nobody uses it right. I’m sorry, but I don’t think I should ever have to “snipe” a zombie with a stupid IPad. I hate getting headaches by having to constantly look down to the pad back up to the tv every 20 seconds doing the simple things like inventory. I bought the Wii. I played the Wii U at a friends house. I’m not making the same mistake buying a Nintendo console EVER again.
so true joe and the wii is so useless why did it get so popular i mean it was the first to intruduce motion control but its horrible. you cant even watch movies in and its almost imbosible to be friends with some one online because you need to have there code and the games suck your just making your self look like a dumby playing them
So is my humor bone broken? I’m not sure what happened in this comic, but I’m thinking it was supposed to be “funny.” However, it not only wasn’t funny, it didn’t make any sense. Was there a punch line?
Also, buying a wii used right now might not be a bad idea given the entire catalog of games available. In fact there might just be enough games worth playing on it. Heck, I finally got a used DS because there’s finally 3 games worth playing on it and they’re cheap (pkmn black, a professor layton game, and the world ends with you).
But if you really want a WiiU, you can play ZombiU, wooooo I guess.
Joe I just want to know that I’am the only one with the first model of Xbox 360 in my class and I’m very happy because i have something that nobody in my class had and I have a least 24 games because I bought it from a friend of my dad and he gave me 10 games free.
Well, PC gamers struggle with getting hard copies of games on their release date. When Skyrim came out i went to 4 best buys to find one and they all were sold out. None at gamestop either, good riddance. Anyhow thats ok, since all consoles are outdated compared to the customizable beast that is the PC.
Ugh… enough of the PC elitist stuff please, that’s not the point of this comic.
They were probably sold out because stores don’t care 500 copies of PC games for the 5 or less people that will come buy them…Stores focus on consoles….And the Wii U isn’t exactly selling either stores constantly have them in stock at all times….Hell I walked into a gamestop to get one for my girlfriend today December 23rd 2 days before Christmas and they had a crap load…Target and Wal-mart always have them also
I think the release of a new console is the perfect moment to get yourself the one that just became last generation. They are cheap and have huge game libraries, which often contains a few dozen ones that have become classics, so you know that what you get will be damn good.
Consumist american…
Omfg who cares? Consoles are the retarded cousins of pc-gaming anyway. Make a comic of that mental image!
pc gaming is retared compared to console gaming but pc is fun gaming
So, next week we talk about how do you hack the console, install your own firmware with Linux on it, then hook it up to a computer screen, mouse and keyboard, press a button and thus breathe in a new life into a console, transforming it from a one-purpose gaming device into an all-purpose computer??? Do we? Do we? Do we?
On a related note, it worth to buy an Xbox 360 and abuse it in the above manner, or should one wait for Xbox 720 or whatever will it be called and do that instead?
old cheap and obsolete? well that applies to xbox 360 and ps3 as well
Point me to an old and cheap PS3, NOW!
you’re right, OVERPRICED, old and obsolete
irony
Or realize the Wii-u is just as gimmicky as the Wii and will offer next to nothing for people that don’t care about Mario/Zelda/Metroid or the kids games..
As far as consoles at pawn shops, dear god avoid the 360′s because their lifetime is so short and the red ring of death is so infamous for a reason.. Not to mention the older ones that would overheat..
Gimmick or not, like the Wii, it’ll have some amazing games over the next few years just like any other console. Take Super Mario Galaxy and No More Heroes for example.
I actually own the console unlike you, and have more knowledge about it, amd can say that it is FAR from a gimmick. It is VERY innovative, and has an incredible amount of potential. Been playing Zombie U (which isn’t a kid game), and it is amazing the way you can use the gamepad with the game. There is countless amount of possibilities, and even RTS can be made on the Wii-U, using the gamepad to click on units, and choose what to to do with them. The majority of the Wii-U launch titles on the Wii-U are actually rated T and M, but you annoying ” wanna be hardcore” gamers, think that a game can only be good if it has blood and guts, and realistic graphics, which of course is a load of crap.
Really need to re-read my comments before posting..
Or you can just go to walmart i work at and pick one up…. and yes I’m talking about the 500 dollar edition…. We totally have like 20 or so in the back too. :/
Nintendo fans to come in with huge rage!
Kidding but is there any particular reasons-
*looks closer*
Wait was that just a spider @_@?
This is actually a really good point.
Buying something old to save up, and get all the accessories for it for future use.
The only potential problem is that if it’s a new-gen console, more people would move there, and almost all of the best games will be there once they actually come out.
And if you stay with an outdated model for too long, then the community will begin to shrink :/
500 bucks itching to be spent?
BUILD A PC!
With AMD going down the crapper you can score really good graphic cards for really cheap prices (downwards to 80-100 dollars for a one-year old graphic card). The most expensive piece of equipment you would buy is the motherboard (150-200 dollars). RAMs are like 18 dollars for dual 8gb. And a CPU is smth like 100 dollars again if you don’t want more than 4 cores, which is more than enough (more than 4 cores is useless, unless the programs you have running on them have been built to handle more cores. And most of them aren’t). You spend 500 dollars to buy your hardware, and another 100 maybe for various paraphernalia (screen, keyboard, mouse if you don’t have those already, and a PC case/power supply). Then you buy games (or you have the capability to pirate them UNTIL YOU CAN AFFORD TO BUY THEM) for really cheap prices through the Steam christmas sale or from gog.com.
And there you go. You have yourself a more powerful gaming console than anything else out there, which you can use to do other stuff on, like draw awesome comic strips, or watch a movie, or whatever else you need. You also got better support for your games, since you don’t rely on Sony/Nintendo/Microsoft to fix problems for you, instead you can ask other players to provide you with a fix, or even build a fix yourself with a few lines of code. Then you got modding capabilities for most of your games. Best part is, that your PC won’t get outdated for at least 6-7 years, and when it does you won’t have to go out and buy a new one, as well as new games for it. Besides you can extend how long it can be kept up to date by occasionally upgrading its hardware. When it’s 3 years old, get a new graphics card. When it’s 5 get a new motherboard, when it’s 6 change its CPU, when it’s 7 overclock it and you can squeeze another 2-3 years of fun out of it. And after that, it’s still gonna be useful to keep as a back-up PC or to just use it to play your old games on it, which as mentioned, will never run out of support or modding communities, or go and gift it to your nephew/child/whoever needs it in your family, cause it can still be useful as it’s sole purpose is not gaming.
To recap, with about 600-700 dollars, this time of year, you can build a really powerful PC rig AND buy games for it, and you won’t have to deal with problematic outdated consoles and 70-80 dollar games that never go on sale.
Consoles were fun once upon a time when computers were only used by NASA and the army, and they would take up a whole room. Now they are just obsolete, and holding back the technology put into games.
An impressive attempt to troll everyone at once…. Award worthy perhaps…? Hmmm….
*Sigh…* Look, I have a PC as well, I play games on it, TF2 is my biggest vice, and Steam, GOG, and anything else along those lines are fucking awesome! However, a console is cheap, has everything included to play games right out of the box, every game baring CD conditions will work properly they way they were intended, you can buy games at a discount if you know where to look, AND the biggest advantage of them all… you can pick up a controller and actually lean back in a couch or chair and just immerse yourself into a game.
You have to tolerate the fact that not everybody is wanting a PC, they’re kind of intimidating and if you don’t build it correctly, you’ve wasted money. There is no superiority here unless you’re talking about certain games working better with keyboard and mouse, having the best graphics and online gaming, and most of all… RAW PROCESSING POWER and having the best tech out there, that’s PC’s turf.
This month’s comic/how to buy parody is all about being a cheap-ass.
You do know you can setup a PC to most TV’s now right? the only reason’s not to get a PC is the DRM, the fact you have to install the game (ofc with most games you don’t even have to put the disk in after that.) also most console ports allow use with controller.
The only reason me or any of my m8s play console is for games that don’t come out on PC and CO-OP games. also PC is only slightly more expensive but you get bang for your buck and the games are cheaper even without any special offers.
For 400€, I could buy about 100 AAA games for 360 or PS3 on ebay. I think there aren’t even that many games for the consoles that are worth playing.
if you wait a few months we will have 5 more LOL